


Two Hearts Believing in Just One Mind

by Mendeia



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh!
Genre: Angsty Schmoop, Gen, M/M, Not Even Close To Egyptian Mythology
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-08-07
Updated: 2008-08-07
Packaged: 2017-11-26 00:44:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/644681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mendeia/pseuds/Mendeia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Atem passed into the afterlife, how did Yugi deal? Did life go on? Or is there a chance, or even the desire, to go back to what was? YugiAtem-centric, hints at more than platonic love here.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Two Hearts

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first foray into the Yu-Gi-Oh! genre, so take that for what it is. But my muse struck and wouldn't leave me alone until I created this three-shot story. It's just a take on what happened after the series, on how lives went on or didn't go on, and what happens when there are chances to risk everything for love.
> 
> Note: this is meant to be a shonen-ai, non-graphic fic. Basically, it's Yugi/Atem, but long, long before either has truly come to understand what is already in place between them. If you have a problem with that, I politely ask you to refrain from reading.
> 
> I don't own any of the characters herein – I am only borrowing them for entertainment. Also, the chapter titles come from a Phil Collins song, which I also don't own. Sigh.
> 
> Enjoy!

It was well after midnight when the bedroom door opened, revealing one extremely tired Yugi Mutou pulling at errant suit buttons and clasps with a tense frustration. Tugging off his tuxedo with very little grace, he flung the overly-expensive garment onto his desk chair in a rented heap. Running his fingers through his eternally wild hair, he sank down onto the familiar bed in his boxers and undershirt and sighed as his head hit the old pillow.

"I sure hope they have a good honeymoon," the young man thought to himself, mind rushing through the craziness of the past few days. Though they had been "just friends" for a very long time, eventually Jounouchi and Mai had discovered a mutual attraction between them that blossomed into affection and love, a relationship that balanced both, strengthening one and softening the other. It had taken years, but those years were not wasted as the couple grew together, finally ending in tonight's glamorous yet heartfelt wedding. Yugi had, of course, been Jounouchi's best man, and he still swelled with pride and friendship and joy for his friends.

"I think today is my proudest, happiest day," Yugi said to himself, folding his hands under his head and staring at the ceiling. "I've had days I was even more proud of someone, or of myself, but not many where I was this full of happiness, too."

Unwillingly, the champion duelist's mind flashed back to that fateful day almost ten years prior when he had beaten the spirit of the Millennium Puzzle and sent his closest friend onto a deserved afterlife of rest. It had been his hardest duel, and at the end he could honestly say he was more proud of his own skills and accomplishment than ever before, or since, but the victory was still tinged with pain. For that day had also marked the end of a friendship, something more than a friendship, whose absence haunted him even now. Like trying to go on after the death of a loved one, Yugi had found a place in life that suited him, but there was forever a nagging hole in his heart, an emptiness that nothing and no amount of time had ever filled.

Wrenching his thoughts from the pain of that one loss, Yugi remembered that he owed Rebecca another email. The American duelist had grown from an insistent and obnoxiously intelligent girl into a cleverly outspoken woman, both unusually attractive and successful in all that she attempted. Over the years, Rebecca had lost her infatuation with Yugi, but always there remained a certain tension between them, and Yugi knew all too well that she continued to harbor some romantic attachments to him. Flattered by her attention, Yugi had continued to politely decline her subtle advances, regretting that it was so necessary, but unable to do otherwise.

"She just…doesn't get it. None of them do," Yugi said bitterly, rolling over and throttling his pillow, his joy on behalf of his friends lost in a storm of sudden emotion. "Not Rebecca, not Anzu, not even Jounouchi, though his interest isn't like the girls'. Grandpa keeps trying to set me up with the 'nice young women' he meets, but it just doesn't work."

Yugi punched his pillow again, remembering a particularly difficult conversation between himself and Anzu while they had both still been in high school together, about a year after the pharaoh had moved on. She, having always struggled to reconcile her feelings for the two parts of Yugi, had finally decided that it was Yugi Mutou, not the pharaoh Atem, whom she loved.

> " _I think maybe it's always been you," Anzu said shyly, looking out across the school's rooftop at the city. "You've changed, of course, but you're still the same one who came to my rescue once upon a time. The pharaoh, I mean Atem, was a strong, dynamic personality, but it was the gentleness of heart that drew me. Your gentleness, Yugi."_
> 
> " _Anzu…" he began._
> 
> " _So, I guess what I'm saying is that my feelings for you are very strong. I know I've confused you over the years, and I'm sorry for that. But I wondered if you could see that I've gotten over Atem, and I'm here if you still feel the way I think you once did about me." The wind played with Anzu's hair in a delicate, pretty way, and her blue eyes were wide with hope and feeling when she finally turned them on the young man beside her._
> 
> " _Anzu, I can't." Yugi could not bear to look at her anymore, so he turned to the horizon instead, speaking as gently and honestly as he could, softening his tone but not his words. "It isn't that I don't forgive you for loving the other me. Of course I do. But…I just can't give my heart away."_
> 
> " _What do you mean?" Anzu's voice sounded stuffy, and Yugi knew without looking that she was caught off-guard, her hopes dashed._
> 
> " _Love is…supposed to be when you give your heart to someone and they become part of you. And I sort of already did that. There was another half of my soul, the person who completed me like nobody else, but it's all over now. No other love can replace it."_
> 
> " _Are you saying you were in love with the pharaoh?"_
> 
> " _It isn't that simple," Yugi deflected her question. "Think about all the romantic movies you like so much, all the fairy-tale stories about people who are meant to be together forever, couples who are destined for each other. Do you think that, say, if one of them died, that the other could ever really love another person?" Yugi's voice grew deep and shook with something like frustration. "How could someone who had known true love, or whatever you want to call it, settle for anything less than that? If the princess died, the charming prince might not ever love again, unless he found that same love-at-first-sight-'til-death-do-us-part love, you know? Not because other girls who came into his life weren't special or wonderful, but because they could never equal what he had already lost."_
> 
> " _But…is it love or isn't it? The way you talk about it…" Anzu whispered, not sure how to finish her sentence._
> 
> " _Anzu, everything we feel towards the people in our lives is love of one kind or another. You know that better than anybody. This just…doesn't have a good word to describe it. The closest I can come without using the romantic terms that confuse the issue is the concept of 'mine.' The other me was 'mine' and I was 'his,' and that was all there was. We fit, we belonged, and nothing and nobody can ever fit or belong like that again."_
> 
> " _Yugi…"_
> 
> " _Nobody can ever be a part of my mind, a part of my heart like that ever again! I didn't think I was alone until suddenly I wasn't alone anymore. And now, even though I've got you and Jounouchi and Honda and everybody else, I'm still alone, because I'm alone in my own head! I can't, can't give my heart away to anyone because it's already given and gone!" Yugi punched the chain-link fence that ringed the rooftop, striking the ringing metal again and again as though the pain of his body could make him forget the ache in his soul._
> 
> " _I didn't know," Anzu said quietly as sorrow washed through her, both for herself and for the obvious suffering of one she cared for deeply. Then, resuming her usual role in Yugi's life, she moved to catch his shoulders and pull him away from his furious pummeling, saying, "Stop now. You'll get hurt."_
> 
> " _I'm already hurt," Yugi said sullenly, but he allowed her to draw him back and examine his bruised hands. While she made sympathetic noises and wrapped a handkerchief about one long cut on his knuckles, Yugi stood perfectly still, staring across the horizon, his thoughts racing bitterly._
> 
> " _My life did go on, and there's a world of adventures waiting for me, it's true. I sent him away because it was best for us, because I had to be able to live without him and he without me, for both our sakes. But just because I can exist without him doesn't mean I want to anymore. Somehow, even though I proved I was strong enough alone, being on my own is empty now. What does it matter how strong I become if my heart can never let go?"_

Yugi felt his chest constrict as he relived the memory, the familiar anguish rising and threatening to choke him. In the nine intervening years, he had learned to tame the new demon inside his heart, to hold back the isolating void that lived in his deepest spirit, but he could never eradicate it. It was a terrible irony: he had surrendered one being of shadow from his soul only to acquire another, far more cutting one. And this demon chewed at his resolve every day, weakening and draining him. To please his grandfather and friends Yugi had tried dating several times, but his feelings always distilled back to the affection of friendship, nothing more. What he had said to Anzu so long ago was still true: his heart had been given and he could never get it back, nor give it away again.

"I sure hope it was worth it," he thought for the millionth time as he flung himself onto his back and stared at the ceiling as though it might reply. "I hope you are so happy wherever you are that you don't have any regrets about me or the others. Maybe you've already forgotten about me."

A prickle in his eyes told Yugi that he was moments away from crying. Some would have said he was a grown man now, a world champion duelist several times over, and far too old to cry. But Yugi knew better. In his heart he knew that honest, real emotion and expression was far healthier than any perceived "appropriate" behavior.

"Could you have forgotten about me? I mean, you had a whole other life before we even met; for all I know you found your true soul-mate in Egypt and I really was nothing more than a host and a good friend. I guess that would make things easier on you. You wouldn't be missing me the way I miss you. You might even be with that person right now. So, even though it would be awful for me, I hope you did forget all about me. I hope you found your eternity and you're happy with the friends and family who really mattered in the first place. I hope you're not torn in half the way I am, always incomplete."

A tear slipped and ran uncomfortably into his ear. Roughly rubbing at his face with a balled fist, Yugi turned onto his side and tried to force himself to sleep, clutching the blankets around him although the night was warm. The sorrow and loss he had lived with for so many years was much harder to ignore now than it had been before, the threat of despair much, much greater. What had once been a dull pain had grown unceasingly over time; his heart now wept blood with every beat. The only thing that could possibly hurt more than being without the other half of himself was believing that his other half had forgotten him, and yet it was the only thing he could hope for if he wanted any peace at all for the spirit he had loved and lost.

Loved.

And lost.

Yugi, choked by his own pain beyond screaming, swallowed his soul and forced himself into welcome oblivion.

 

-==OOO==-

 

Elsewhere, somewhere beyond the realm of human comprehension, another man sat disconsolately on a hard bench, thinking. Gold bangles clanked musically on his wrists and arms as he fidgeted with his royal robes in agitation. Feeling an uneasy, sleeping rest that was not his own steal over his mind at last, he hung his head, tri-colored hair brushing across his face in the light wind of the night.

"Of course I haven't forgotten you, aibou. Even if I couldn't still hear your thoughts now that I am beyond the Western Gate, I could never forget you. It's generous of you to wish I had, for the sake of my own peace of mind, but you of all people should know I would rather have honest pain than not remember my past. I only wish you had forgotten me and been spared this unending pain."

Atem had never expected to see or hear from the reincarnated half of himself again after he passed through the doorway of light and into his eternity. The choice to leave had been the most painful decision of his unnatural existence, but he had believed that he owed it to Yugi to let the boy have a life of his own, free of an alien spectre haunting his heart. It was only later that he had discovered he was still bound to the boy in his mind, with Yugi's memories, thoughts, and feelings still leaking across space and time.

"I never meant to put you through so much torment. Had I known what separating would do to you, what it would do to us both, I'm not sure I would have left. You've grown stronger and braver than I ever anticipated, you have surpassed me in both wisdom and courage, and your heart remains pure and untainted by greed or hate. You are a miracle of a person, I've always known that. I thought by leaving you the rest of your life as your own you would do better than you would have being shackled with me. You have done well, but you are not better. You haven't been the same since the day we parted."

Atem closed his eyes in concentration. Sometimes, if Yugi's mind was relaxed enough in sleep, he almost felt like he could reach the boy. Yugi did dream of him often and woke comforted by the fancy that he had met his other half somewhere between sleep and death, never realizing it was almost true. Atem could indeed spur the dreams, but he could not interact directly. Just as he could not make himself known in Yugi's mind, he could only hear and feel what his other thought and felt, an echo of the life he lived apart. At times the echo was faint, if Yugi were concentrating on something, but other times, especially when he was dueling or feeling particularly lonely, their one-sided rapport was all too clear.

"Is the boy well?" came a voice. Atem opened his eyes to see Seth standing nonchalantly in the doorway.

"He's not a boy anymore," the pharaoh answered automatically, in spite of the fact that he also continued to think of Yugi as one. It was habit, comforting, and hard to break.

"He will always be a boy at heart, just as you have never been one." Atem shrugged at the statement, wordlessly admitting its truth. "But is he well?" the advisor repeated.

"No more or less than usual. But I fear that the sorrow is starting to gnaw away his natural defenses against despair. Time is beginning to take its toll, and I can see no way for him to avoid greater pain as the feelings get worse." Atem gestured for his friend to join him on the long seat. Having reconnected with his past, the pharaoh had renewed the close kinship with this successor to his throne, and Seth had served as a dedicated and understanding companion, much like Jounouchi had always been to Yugi.

"It is a powerful spirit that can withstand such pressure, but he is mortal and there is no joy strong enough to outweigh his pain and silence the clamor of his heart," Seth nodded, taking his place beside his friend and fellow king. "I am surprised he has managed for so long."

"I'm not," Atem replied. "Yugi has a soul greater than any I've ever known."

"Be that as it may, all strength eventually gives out under the weight of painful emotion. It is the cost of retaining one's humanity. If you feel that he is beginning to slip, I would anticipate he will collapse rather quickly as his remaining courage evaporates."

"I fear you may be right, Seth. And I shudder to think what it will do to him when those few barriers he has erected against his despair finally collapse."

"Then what would you do?"

"Nothing! I can do nothing!" Atem's eyes glowed with contained fury, and he clenched his fists. "The boy is the other half of my soul, the aibou to my very being, and I am condemned to watch him live his life in unanswerable pain. What sort of restful eternity is this?"

"I do not know, my pharaoh, but you must reach him before it is too late." Though both had ruled over Egypt, Seth had never ceased thinking of Atem as his pharaoh.

"We have spoken thusly many times, my friend, and yet here I remain doing nothing, and somewhere my aibou continues in suffering. No matter how many times you counsel me, nothing comes of it. Not that I blame you for our circumstances, of course," the scarlet-eyed king said apologetically.

"Of course, my pharaoh. But I believe that one thing has changed from our previous conversations." Seth, like his reincarnation Seto Kaiba, had a true gift for delivering good news and making it sound inconsequential and beneath notice. However, Atem had waited too long for such words to ignore them.

"What do you mean?" his very being lit in excitement. For the first time since he had passed into this place of eternity, he began to feel the stirrings of something truly alive within his heart, assuming Seth's comment portended what he thought it did.

"One benefit to eternity is the possibility for much study and contemplation," Seth began slowly and with a very small wry smile. "And I believe I may have found a way to reunite your spirit with the boy at last. The stars and moon of the earth are in a rare alignment, and I have at last located a very old tome of magic and wisdom which may assist us. But," and his voice grew warning, "there will be great risk to you both, and great sacrifice."

"Sacrifice?"

"Beyond the pain it would cause you both to undergo such a thing, and it would be very painful, you and the boy would be bound for all time, never able to live independently again. Even in the afterlife, there would be no possibility of unbinding if either or both of you wished it. In essence, you would be required to willingly and knowingly surrender your existences as individuals, the two of you becoming truly and irrevocably symbiotic forever. Neither of you would ever know solitude or freedom again."

"Nor would we know loneliness or isolation," the pharaoh countered. "But can this be the only cost of such a miracle?"

"No. There is more." Seth sighed.

"I will risk anything. He is my hikari. I grow dark without him. But, what of the risk to him?"

"Without lifting the Millennium Puzzle from its resting place, there will be no focus powerful enough to contain your immortal soul, save the boy's frail human form. And there is no telling if he would survive the process."

"You mean it could kill him to rejoin with me."

"More than that. As I said, neither could live without the other. So if the boy's body cannot withstand the rebinding, you would both die. However, because you were neither made one nor apart, yet the magic had been cast, the result would be the destruction of your very souls."

"Our very… Do you mean to say that if the process killed Yugi's body that both our souls would cease to exist as well?"

"Indeed. Neither of you would be able to return to the afterlife. You would pass into what very few mortals have ever known: true oblivion. It is, perhaps, a better thing to be condemned to the pain of the underworld for all eternity than to suffer such an unmaking."

They were both silent for a long while, lost in thought.

"My pharaoh," Seth finally broke the quiet, "I offer you this for I do not wish to see you so burdened by the pains suffered by your reincarnation. If I may be so bold, you are not the man I once knew and called king and friend. You have not been that man for as long as you have been with us here."

"No," Atem answered quietly. "And you're not bold. It is true. Even remembering my past, even reliving the last of my days, I am still incomplete. Once, I was not whole for I did not know of myself. Now I am still not whole, because even with my own life restored, I have lost the reality of myself. I think, perhaps, I already depend upon my aibou for life, for that which makes a soul real."

"But are you willing to take this risk?"

"I? Certainly. I have waited far too long for such a chance, consequences or no. But we can do nothing without Yugi's permission."

"Then perhaps it is time to…as my own reincarnation would say, call in a favor."


	2. One Mind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Same disclaimers apply.
> 
> One thing – I do apologize in advance for writing Jounouchi with the Brooklyn accent. I couldn't help it. I always hear his voice that way, even with the deeper baritone of his original voice-actor. Besides, it adds a bit of spice. If you're a purist, please overlook this. Thanks.
> 
> Enjoy!

It was an extremely slow day in the shop, and Yugi was bored stiff. Without the prospect of Jounouchi dropping in for a visit or to challenge his best friend, the young champion had little to hope for. All his other friends were busy either doing post-wedding chores for the new couple or catching up with the out-of-town guests before they departed. Yugi had excused himself from any social activities; the cold of loneliness made him avoidant of all but his most trusted friends. "Working in the shop" had been an entirely plausible excuse, but it was rapidly becoming a dire way to spend an already miserable afternoon.

In addition to the heavy burden on his heart was the frustration of having his only customers of the day so far be the worst possible people to wander in: slightly-ignorant fans. Working in his grandfather's shop, Yugi had seen the same scenario day after day, and had grown to despise it. Someone would enter and immediately begin treating him like a child, for he had never quite grown tall enough to appear to be an adult, nor had his face lost its wide innocence even if the shadows of his soul-deep loss darkened his eyes. However, after a few minutes of condescending behavior, the customer would suddenly recognize Yugi as "THAT Yugi Mutou" and begin to fawn over him in appallingly poor taste, generally making up for earlier behavior with some slight that, as often as not, was, "You look so much taller on TV! Who would have guessed how young you look when you're not dueling?" There had only been three people in the store that morning, and all three had fit perfectly into this hated mold.

As the door opened, Yugi straightened, praying to whatever god would hear that he would not be treated to a fourth rendition of the cookie-cutter customers. A hooded form entered, dripping water everywhere. When had it started raining? The individual was quite tall, somehow filling the space with a confident presence. The door shut behind the customer, and a sudden trickle flashed through the back of Yugi's mind. Even years away from the last otherworldly incident he had experienced, he would never, ever forget what real magic felt like.

"Yugi Mutou."

That voice. Yugi knew that voice, he was sure of it! The hood fell back from the visitor's head, revealing an entirely startling, and totally familiar visage. In a heartbeat, the day went from tedious and predictable to extraordinary.

"Dark Magician!" he exclaimed, moving around the counter. "What are you doing here?"

"Repaying a kindness that was shown to me many, many times," he replied, and there was no mistaking the quirk of a smile that softened his features and lit his eyes from within. "You have remained entirely faithful to the heart of the cards, and your past exploits have not been forgotten in my world. Dark Magician Girl also sends her regards. Do tell her that I told you so, or she'll pester me unremittingly."

"What—what's going on?" Suddenly feeling more like his old self, eager and in the middle of another adventure, Yugi's mouth went dry.

"My strength in your world cannot last long. Indeed, it took many of us to raise enough power and will to bring me here at all. But it was the only way to open the door for you to enter the Shadow Realm once more."

"The Shadow Realm?" Yugi tried to get control of himself. What kind of champion duelist asked so many stupid questions?

"Yes. Take my hand. There is much to do."

The Dark Magician extended a hand Yugi knew almost as well as he knew his own. Hours upon hours of playing Duel Monsters in countless tournaments and private games, all of which he had won, of course, meant he knew each and every one of his cards, their holograms, and as much of their "true" forms as he could remember. Even as his still-small hand was closed in the large and strong palm of his favorite monster, Yugi felt a moment's trepidation. He had never been in the Shadow Realm alone before. Always, always his friends, or at least his other self had been with him. What could he do all by himself? It wasn't as if Yugi had any special powers like the pharaoh had once possessed.

"Do you have your deck?"

"Always." Smiling violet eyes met secretive dark ones.

"Do not let go."

Before he could even take a breath or register the Dark Magician's words, he felt himself pulled violently sideways, his arm jerking in its socket roughly. This journey was unlike anything he had ever known. The transition into a Shadow Game had always been subtle, sometimes so much so that players were unaware of leaving the real world. And when he and the pharaoh had descended to the heart of the Shadow Realm where the true monsters dwelt, it had been an easy, floating fall. Closing his eyes tightly, Yugi tried to ignore the sensations that impaled themselves on his senses: noise so loud he could not make it out, heat and cold so extreme he felt as though blisters should be sprouting on his exposed skin, light, dark, and color so bright it penetrated his eyelids and burnt itself on his mind. If he was moving, if he was screaming, if he was breathing, if he was still holding tightly to the Dark Magician, he had no hope of knowing it amidst the chaos.

With the same abruptness, everything stopped.

In an ideal world, Yugi would have straightened up, shaken a smile from his lips, and feigned that such an ordeal had not fazed him. He would have been humble but strong, immediately returning to the matters at hand as though nothing untoward had transpired. He would have reacted with dignity and honor as befitted a champion duelist and the chosen one who had helped save the world more than once.

Unfortunately, even the Shadow Realm was not an ideal world.

Yugi fell to his knees, cognizant only of wanting to die. Then he vomited until he could bear no more, retching and wheezing weakly as he crumpled to his side. If he had had the energy to be ashamed, he would have flushed until his face was scarlet; instead, he could feel it draining until he must be quite white. He felt ashen inside.

Maybe he blacked out; he had no way of knowing. One moment he was in agony, the next he felt cool and calm, as though the flames of his pain had been instantly doused with icy water. Blinking in surprise, Yugi looked up. The Dark Magician stood over him, a concerned look crossing his impassive countenance. An odd sort of cooing noise drew his attention to a fuzzy ball that was eagerly hopping beside him. As soon as Yugi turned his eyes on it, the little monster nuzzled him affectionately.

"Kuriboh!"

Doubly happy at the recognition, the little brown Kuriboh rubbed his fuzzy body against Yugi's cheek eagerly, making a sound somewhere between hooting and purring. The champion duelist sat back on his heels, putting a hand on the monster's "head."

"You healed me, didn't you?" It chirped the affirmative, attempting to wiggle its way into the boy's arms for a hug, causing him to laugh. Yugi had forgotten how oddly useful Kuriboh could be under the right circumstances. "It's good to see you, too. Thank you very much for helping me. I really appreciate it."

"Come." Dark Magician's voice broke the moment, causing even the cuddly Kuriboh to draw back to a more respectful distance.

"Where are we going?" Yugi wanted to know as he climbed to his feet.

"Not far."

"Can't you tell me what's going on?"

"No. Someone else will do that." Again was that almost-smile. The duelist's curiosity was about to suffocate him.

"But…"

"There." Dark Magician pointed toward where a few monsters were clustered. It was nothing but a clearing in the lush woods of the Shadow Realm, a small stream beyond. Yugi could see a host of extremely familiar beings, all apparently waiting for him. But it was only when Dark Magician Girl winked and moved to one side that he could see that the monsters were actually forming a small circle. And in the middle…

"Pharaoh!"

He was moving before he was even aware of it. There, looking exactly as he had in all of Yugi's dreams, stood the one he had missed so much. Light danced on the many golden pieces of jewelry that decked the pharaoh's body. A dark and royal cape blew in the light wind dramatically, framing the white linen of his robes against midnight purple. Anybody would be impressive in such splendor, but to Yugi's eyes, Atem outshone it all. Even an old sack could not have made the lost half of himself less than perfectly beautiful.

"Yugi!" Atem opened his arms wide and caught the rushing boy in a fierce embrace. Yugi had grown a bit, he now appreciated, although he would always be short enough for the pharaoh to rest his cheek against the boy's head. Atem pulled him closer, cracking both their ribcages and not caring for an instant. He felt elation thunder through him with the force of a thousand stallions. Here was warmth after cold, hope after despair, life after death.

Yugi wanted to say something. He desperately needed to shout out all the words that had spent years piling up in his heart, relieving himself of their burden and freeing his spirit once and for all. But his tongue felt heavy. All he could do was return the tight embrace, burrowing his head into the strong chest, and shudder as emotion coursed through him. He found himself sobbing, insensible attempts to speak interrupted by loud gasps and ungraceful sounds that came from a throat and nose closed with the sudden explosion of long-held grief.

"You're…here…" he finally managed.

"Yes. We're together," the familiar voice rumbled, still almost an octave lower than Yugi's own.

"How? Why?" Yugi twisted his hands into the pharaoh's robes, something between hysterics and laughter bouncing through his words.

"It is a long story. Are you able to hear it?" Although Atem's tone remained calmly warm, inside the pharaoh was shouting for unbridled joy. His boy's tears did not distress him; he knew all too well how Yugi must be feeling. His own brown cheeks were wet. He had never known he could be so happy in one moment. But then, he had been very unhappy for a long, long time.

"Tell me." The shorter version of himself straightened up, gamely attempting to control his emotions. But he did not extricate himself from Atem's arms, nor did he unclench his hands. Violet eyes met scarlet, and that which rocked through them both held them breathless for a moment.

"I…have been watching you, aibou, all this time. It never occurred to me what you might suffer by my leaving, or I swear to you I would never have done it. You have been strong, my hikari, to survive without hope or joy for so long. But it was breaking you."

"I feel like I was dying a bit at a time," Yugi nodded solemnly. He knew, all to well, that he could not have survived such despair for much longer.

"You were. And I could not let you be hurt anymore. So, with the help of Seth's great wisdom and study," he nodded at the previously-unnoticed individual standing amidst the other creatures, "along with a multitude of those duel monsters loyal to us both, we found a way to bring you here. That Shadow Realm, of course, being a world between yours and mine, and thus the only place we could meet."

"You did this for me?" Yugi asked incredulously.

"For both our sakes." Atem abruptly crushed the boy against him again. "Neither of us could withstand much more of that horrible emptiness."

From within the circle of the pharaoh's arms, Yugi nodded. A thought found its way past the shock and happiness in his mind and wiggled at him, "He missed me. He didn't forget me after all."

Yugi and Atem would probably have gone on holding each other and rejoicing in each other for hours, but time was not a friend to the pair. Seth stepped forward and coughed delicately. The pharaoh pulled his eyes from the boy in his grip and read his friend's gaze.

"You're right," he answered the unspoken statement. "We cannot be lost in this for long."

"Why? What's going on? Is there trouble?" Yugi wanted to know, looking up quickly.

"No, nothing like that. But…" Atem stopped, suddenly seized by a touch of cold fear. What if Yugi didn't want them re-bound to each other's souls? What if the boy wanted his freedom more than he wanted his partner, in spite of his suffering? The pharaoh had no doubts about his hikari's bravery against any risk, but he realized that the sacrifice asked might be more than Yugi was willing to give, even for this.

"What is it, pharaoh?"

"Yugi," and Atem held his boy by the shoulders so they could look one another in the eye, "consider carefully what I have to say." He took a deep breath, trying to banish the fears that had all but leapt into his heart.

"How much do you want me back with you, forever?"

 

-==OOO==-

 

With Atem doing most of the talking and Seth nodding at appropriate intervals, the Egyptians explained the situation relatively quickly. Yugi felt his head spinning. Only the night before, he had been plagued by painful recollections of a joy he would never know again, and yet now here he was, with that which he had needed so much offered to him on a silver platter. He was dizzy with it. But, like the skilled duelist he had become, Yugi knew he could not let excitement overcome his better judgment. There was much to consider.

"Are—are you sure you would want to go through with this, pharaoh?" he asked hesitantly. It was so hard to believe that this incredible, resilient, courageous spirit could ever want him enough to give up his own freedom and risk his very soul.

"I'm sure, aibou."

"Oh." Yugi chewed on the inside of his cheek thoughtfully. His other half seemed so…certain. It was more than a little surprising to have been missed that badly.

"Do you have a doubt?" Atem asked gently, a shadow creeping into his eyes.

"No! I mean, well, it isn't the possibility of dying that bothers me. Not really. It's just…I…you…I mean, how could someone like you want to be with me so much? I always thought that…you'd be happy with your own friends from the past," he stuttered, looking fixedly at the grass.

"My hikari…" Yugi was caught completely unaware when Atem swept him into another hug, this one so strong it lifted him right off his feet. The pharaoh clung to him like a lifeline, leaning his head in so that their foreheads rested on each other's shoulders. Their hair mingled and tickled their ears.

"Are you…"

"Aibou," and Atem's voice was soft but quite firm, "believe me. I will respect your wishes if you decline, but do not doubt my sincerity."

"But…"

"Hush. It is extremely generous of you to be hesitant on my behalf, but I assure you that you have no need to worry. I…we…" Atem closed his eyes, wishing to all the gods he could think of for the words to express what he felt. Having been reserved for most of his life and afterlife, his inexperience with speaking the dark and dangerous truths of the heart was understandable, but unacceptable. The pharaoh feared he could not quite make Yugi see how he felt. And the boy obviously was questioning it.

A burst of something rushed through his heart such that he swayed before he regained his balance. It was a feeling so familiar, yet it had been many mortal years since he had known it. Opening his eyes, he met Yugi's intense gaze. The boy was projecting his feelings, perhaps unconsciously, sending Atem all the love and pain and need in his young heart. It was warm, enveloping, overwhelming, genuine, yet tinged with insecurity and bashfulness, the self-doubt that came from years of bitter loneliness. The pharaoh smiled, opened the part of himself that had never quite forgotten how to communicate with the other half of his soul even through their separation, and released his own true feelings in return.

In perfect silence, their hearts met. No medium, no words, no expressions or faces to mar them, their spirits found one another on a level deep within – and sang. It was far more than friendship that sailed between them. It went even beyond love as either had ever known. This was the same harmony that joined stars and clouds, moons and pebbles. This was life, creation, flawless completion. Rightness, as only those who have found it, lost it, and regained it, could experience. They floated together there, lost in bliss, for what felt like forever.

When the last ebb of it was over, Atem put Yugi down wordlessly. Their eyes locked in a single, determined expression, and they nodded in perfect unison.

"Let's do it."

 

-==OOO==-

 

A scramble of claws, feet, wings, and other assorted body parts later, the monsters who had been quietly gathered ushered themselves into a vague pentacle-shape. Anchoring the five points were the five monsters most trusted and loved by the pair that stood alone in the center: Dark Magician Girl, Kuriboh, Dark Magician, the Magnet Warriors, and the Royal Knights, the two groups clustered at their respective positions. Seth stood alone outside the formation, looking at his friend and the boy.

"My pharaoh, are you quite sure…?"

"Yes, Seth. I'm sure." Moving forward, Atem reached between the Mystical Elf and the Baby Dragon to extend a hand. "Thank you. No matter what happens, thank you, my friend."

"I will see you again," Seth firmly stated, taking the outreached hand and clasping it warmly. "I have not yet defeated you yet, after all." Unspoken was the fierce denial that Atem could disappear forever without returning to duel his greatest competition.

"Well, you'll have some time to prepare," the pharaoh smiled. "As will I."

"Be well, and the gods guard you, my pharaoh. And Yugi," Seth called. It was the first time he had spoken to the boy he had worked so hard to summon for the sake of his best friend. "Watch over him for me. I know he will protect you. Be sure you protect him."

"I will," Yugi nodded seriously.

With a bow of mutual respect, the pharaoh and his successor parted, the former returning to take his boy's hand, the latter standing back enough that he could see the entire pentacle.

"May the gods grant you safety in this attempt," Seth whispered.

"Are you ready, Yugi?" Atem asked gently, holding the warm fingers tightly.

"I am." As one, they began to recite the beginning of the spell Seth had uncovered after so much time spent searching for it.

> " _Spirit to spirit, hearts beating together,_  
>  Our souls are bound by the laws of the gods.  
> We fulfill these laws by our own free will and choice,  
> And hereby pray to be made one."

Almost immediately the pair could feel a hum of magic in the air. All things considered, the ritual itself was quite simple for something so profound. The fact of the union of their lives had already been created and confirmed by similar powers of fate; now the challenge was to forge a final and unbreakable link between the two, one that could outlast death, if it got that far. Yugi looked up at the pharaoh as the invoked magic settled in a glowing sphere around them.

"I'm…so glad. Even if this doesn't work and…well, anyway, I'm glad. If nothing else, I got to see you one last time, mou hitori no boku." The pharaoh's eyes went wide at Yugi's words, and he leaned down slightly, his heart suddenly pounding.

A booming voice interrupted whatever Atem had been about to say.

> " _Hail the powers of Osiris and Set,_ _  
> The balance of Nut and Geb._ __  
> The light without which the darkness cannot exist  
>  Calls to its own shadow again.
> 
> _Ka and Ba, Ib and, Sheut,_  
>  Two souls joined as one  
> Beg for the light of creation to reignite their flames  
> And burn that which divides them.
> 
> _Powers of the Shadow Realm,_  
>  Lend your strength and fealty  
> To those who have been your masters of righteousness.  
> Grant them your force!"

At that, the monsters forming the pentacle all turned inward. Yugi held Atem's hand more tightly as each and every monster in the formation unleashed their strongest attacks directly towards the pair. At the moment of impact, Seth shouted again.

> " _Let Ma'at judge you worthy_  
>  To receive a gift and curse  
> That will render your souls as one for eternity  
> In the eyes of even the gods!"

The explosion rocked the world down to its very core. Atem had instinctively flung himself around Yugi as the crushing power of the blast burned through him. It was irrational to try to protect him, he knew, since it was Yugi's strength on trial here, but he could not help it. Somewhere between or around the fire and ice, lasers and magic that was the variety of attacks from all the duel monsters, the pharaoh could feel an older, greater power beneath. The test of body and soul was not in the hands of the creatures; it was as far beyond them as the stars. The roaring onslaught continued, growing only more intense, more painful, every moment.

"Yugi!" the pharaoh shouted even as his throat was torn by the forces that were rending him apart, inside and out.

"Atem!" came back a weak and pain-filled scream.

Then there was nothing.

 

-==OOO==-

 

They found him on the floor of the game shop.

"Yugi? Are you okay? Yugi!"

"Yugi? Say something, buddy!"

"Get outta my way! Yuge!"

"He's not breathing!"

"Somebody get help!"

"Aw, you can't give up on us, man! We need you!"

"Yugi, please! Wake up!"


	3. The End of Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading all the way through – I hope the journey was worth it.
> 
> Same disclaimers as before; don't own them, never will. I'm only borrowing them for sheer pleasure and to satisfy that pesky muse. Also, see previous apology for the accent thing. It just works for me.
> 
> Onto our conclusion…
> 
> Enjoy!

Nothing. Naught.

Then…

Pain. Ripping, horrible, unendurable pain. But even that was better than the cold void, the absence of everything.

Around the agony came flashes of something else, distant memories, like dreams, of a mind, of thoughts, of feelings. He…was. He had a name. He had…a life. He existed.

Thoughts started to trickle through, slow at first, as though fighting through an eternity of obstruction. He was a boy. A hero. A duelist. Yugi.

"I am Yugi. I am." Blinking, he realized he could see, realized he had a body, or a form at least, that was familiar and known even if it wasn't quite physical. Like glass breaking, the pain shattered around him, and suddenly Yugi remembered everything, each and every detail that had been lost in that abyss of emptiness.

"Pharaoh!" His voice echoed in the darkness which reminded him uncomfortably of the many Shadow Games he had played with his partner years ago. Swirling, inky blackness surrounded him. But he was alive. Or something. In one piece, anyway.

"Yugi! Are you all right?" Yugi turned toward the familiar voice and saw Atem floating nearby, anxiety written in every line of his face. "When I woke up here, I feared…"

"No, I'm okay. I think. Where are we?" Yugi asked.

"I'm not sure. But wherever it is, we're together." The pharaoh closed the distance between them, facing his boy, though he would have to get used to Yugi being a man now, and staring at the hikari that meant so much. That was worth risking his immortal soul just to be near.

"Right. But pharaoh…"

"Use my name."

"What?" Yugi blinked confusedly.

"Use my real name, Yugi. You fought so hard to help find it for me. You should at least get used to it," Atem smiled smugly, an edged gleam in his eyes. It was as close as the Egyptian ever got to humor.

"I'll have to, I guess. I mean, if the ritual worked. Did it work?" Yugi could feel himself almost blushing.

"I suppose we'll find out."

The shadows surrounding them seemed to be lightening slowly, like the sky just before false dawn. Instinctively, the pair moved close together, feeling something in the pressure around them. Whatever the final determination was going to be, it was going to happen now.

"Yugi?" Atem looked down at the soul who had given him life and hope time after time. "What you said before, about this being worth it because you could see me again?"

"Yes?"

"I feel the same." Almost shyly, the pharaoh extended his arms around Yugi, not as a protective gesture this time, but a genuine embrace, less frenzied and desperate than the one from their initial meeting. Yugi pulled him close, hugging him tenderly.

"I know."

No matter what happened, for that instant, they were truly two-made-one, and that unity brought a peace with it that no heaven could ever quite equal. The last of the darkness was fading rapidly to light, and a shiver of magic whispered around them. Holding determinedly to one another, Yugi and Atem prepared themselves for whatever came next. Whether they lived or vanished, either was better than ever being apart again.

 

-==OOO==-

 

"Yugi!"

Ooohh, this was truly the worst migraine in the history of migraines. The champion duelist blinked hard against a wetness that was clogging his eyes as he tried to force his screaming brain to accept vision. Blurs above him slowly resolved into faces: Anzu, Honda, and Jounouchi were kneeling around him, their faces white and frightened.

"Hi, guys," he said weakly. His mind was trying to tell him that he was forgetting something important, but it seemed inconsequential against this rapidly-fading headache.

"You're okay! I knew you'd make it! Man, don't you ever scare us like that again!" Honda admonished, a tremble in his voice betraying more than he was saying.

"What happened?" Anzu asked tightly.

"I…uh…aren't you supposed to be on your honeymoon?" Yugi suddenly noticed his best friend, the recently-married man whose brown eyes were still wide. Sense was flooding back into his thoughts as the pain receded.

"Long story, Yuge," he scowled. "That's why we came looking for you. But first, seriously, what happened?"

"I'm…not sure." He was suddenly seized by fear. He remembered thinking that he had seen his lost other self once more. That they had dared everything to reunite. Had it all been a dream?

"No, Yugi. I'm here," whispered a wonderfully real voice in his mind before loss could overtake him. "I always told you that you were much stronger than you gave yourself credit for." Atem appeared beside him in spirit form, visible only to Yugi's eyes. The sight galvanized him, and it shot a sudden and pounding pressure through both interdependent hearts. "We made it. I'm here, and now we'll be together for all time. We'll never be alone again."

Unexpectedly, Yugi felt more hot tears run down his temples and he closed his eyes to relish the feeling. While his three friends fussed around him, worrying kindly, inside he was dancing for joy with the other half of himself. For the first time in years, he was complete once more. The nightmare was over. Life, real life, could begin again.

"I'm okay, really," he shushed the others as he struggled to sit up while brushing away the wetness on his cheeks. "It's complicated."

"Shall I tell them?" Atem wanted to know.

"No," Yugi replied silently, smiling internally, ready to cry again at the simple act of speaking with Atem mind-to-mind once more. It was a more soul-deep method of communication than any either had ever known before. "I'll let them find out. It's…kinda tradition, you know. And I can't wait to see their faces when they see you again!" An answering smirk warmed the back of his mind. Both could well imagine the reaction of their friends to the news, which would probably be a lot more positive than the first time Yugi had admitted that there was another being living within him.

"Can we get into it later? We've sorta got a problem," Honda said, shaking the champion duelist out of his mind abruptly.

"Are you sure you're okay, Yugi?" Anzu asked, her concern still deep.

"I feel better than I have in a long, long time." The smile that crossed his bright features caught Honda, Anzu, and Jounouchi completely off guard. He looked happy, relaxed, confident. That was the face of a Yugi they had rarely seen in years.

"Good. 'Cause you're gonna need it, buddy," Jounouchi said as he helped him to his feet, feeling that his best friend's inexplicable glow was slightly contagious.

"What happened?"

"Well, Mai and I were on our way to the resort when a couple of guys jumped us and challenged us to a duel, and…" As the blonde man sketched out the strange encounter that had caused him to break off his honeymoon in a rush, Yugi felt his smile growing wider. "…So we came straight here, since we figured you if anybody would know what to do now."

"It's about time we had another adventure!" Yugi exclaimed, spreading his arms so wide he almost demolished a carefully-balanced pile of the new Capsule Monsters on a shelf. The gesture was entirely reminiscent of Atem; Yugi had definitely picked up a flair for the dramatic from his Egyptian half. Somewhere inside, he could feel the touch of a soul so close to his own he had not been himself without it there. The earth's gravity could only barely keep his feet on the ground; he was a heartbeat away from flight.

"That's what we were thinking!" Honda agreed. Anzu smiled.

"All right, then! Mai's waiting with the car. Let's go!" Jounouchi pumped a fist in the air triumphantly as Yugi's enthusiasm fed his own.

As Yugi joined his friends in their rush to their next journey through danger and the great unknown, he fingered his deck at his hip and glanced to the spirit that hovered beside him. There was so much he still wanted to say, so much in his heart he needed to express, so much still to admit and recognize and embrace about what he felt and wanted and hoped for the rest of their life together. But there would be time now. All the time of forever. For today, there was a challenge waiting.

And when they spoke, neither Yugi nor Atem knew which had formed and shouted the words that would lead them into eternity.

"It's time to duel!"


End file.
